5 Proven Tips to Mastering Emotional Intelligence

Leaders,

Emotionally Intelligent Leaders are by far the most effective Leaders. They’re able to connect with their people at a different level and achieve things that less Emotionally Intelligent Leaders could.

Emotional Intelligence defined:

The term was first coined in 1990 by researchers John Mayer and Peter Salovey, but was later popularized by psychologist Daniel Goleman. His great book is in the resources at the bottom of this newsletter.

Leading with Emotional Intelligence will make you hugely successful as a leader, but developing it in other people is where you can make the world a better place. It’s also not just about your work, Emotional Intelligence will benefit your career, family, relationships, or any other area that’s important to you. By being more consciously aware of your own emotions and other people, you will become a better person and a more effective communicator.

What are the 5 core areas we should focus on?

1) Self Awareness - this is your ability to recognise your own emotions and moods, and the impact this has on your team. Leaders must be positive and optimistic, their energy and demeanor have a profound effect on the team and their environment.

2) Self Regulation - this is your ability to control and regulate your own emotional impulses or moods. An individual may be completely unreasonable and rude to you, but as someone who is emotionally intelligent, you need to be able to respond in the right professional way. Recognise human behavior and emotions are driven by previous events or something which happened earlier on in their life, you cannot control that or necessarily understand fully where their perspective has come from. What you can do is try and understand what they are saying and help them move forward in the right direction.

3) Empathy — this is your ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and see things through their eyes. Their perspective may be completely different from yours or distorted based on their own values, beliefs, and experience. Your team members are going to go through rough periods during their career under your leadership, it’s called life. You need to be there to support them. Just because we have rules and policies doesn’t mean they are always right. Speak up if you feel like you are doing your team a disservice, challenge HR or your Leader to try and see things differently and be human about the situation.

4) Social Skills - this doesn’t mean being the life and soul of the party. This doesn’t mean you need to be an extrovert. This means someone who sees value in establishing common ground and strong meaningful relationships with people. It’s a healthy way to lead your life.

5) Internal Motivation - this is a general drive to improve things, upgrade your own skillset, and be a better you without extrinsic motivation. This hunger and desire are inspiring and can stimulate your team to follow suit.

Emotional Intelligence isn’t something you gain overnight but by consciously focusing on it and coming into every situation with an open mind, you will become more and more aware. I hope this has been informative and has kicked started your awareness of the 5 core areas which will help you as you navigate through your journey.

All the best

David

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Resources Of The Week

• Book - Daniel Goleman - Emotional Intelligence. Daniel argues that our view of human intelligence is far too narrow. It is not our IQ, but our emotional intelligence that plays a major role in thought, decision-making, and individual success. Self-awareness, impulse control, persistence, motivation, empathy, and social deftness: all are qualities that mark people who excel, whose relationships flourish, who can navigate difficult conversations, who become stars in the workplace.

• TedTalk - Ramona Hacker - 6 Steps to Improve your Emotional Intelligence. In this TedTalk, Ramona guides us through her experiences and shows us 6 steps to become more emotionally intelligent. Through several personal experiences as well as her volunteer experience at a local soccer club and for the student organization AIESEC, she started thinking about the topic of emotional intelligence and how it affects everyone’s lives.

• Mindful App - leadership can be stressful and it’s difficult to switch off in the evenings as our emotions run away. Meditation has historically had a bit of a stigma attached to it, but it is becoming more and more mainstream. The benefits are overwhelming including reducing anxiety and better focus and self-esteem. Years ago running/jogging was not very mainstream, now look at it. I favor the Calm App as Tamara Levitt is a calming influence on me.

Quote of the Week

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