Shaping your feedback mindset.
Understand what constitutes great feedback.
Recognise common mistakes.
Remain problem focused, making it impactful.
Really master your feedback with examples of what to say.
Build your feedback knowledge.
Feedback fails because of how it's delivered, not because it's wrong. Five things to avoid.
Labelling. Feedback tied to personality rather than behaviour. "You didn't come across very confident" describes who someone is, not what they did. That's not actionable.
Silence. Withholding feedback is its own failure. People drift, slowly, invisibly, away from what good looks like. By the time a performance review surfaces the gap, it's a shock to everyone.
No evidence. Vague feedback gets dismissed. Anchor it to something specific, a document, a moment, a number. The more concrete, the harder to ignore and the easier to act on.
No impact. If someone doesn't understand why it matters, they won't change. Connect the feedback to real consequences. Answer the "is this really a big deal?" question before they ask it.
No path forward. Every feedback conversation needs a clear next step. Ask what they'd do differently. If they're stuck, give them something concrete to leave with. Insight without action is just commentary.
How to ensure the feedback lands well.
A structure that works.
Delivering feedback is uncomfortable. Sometimes it goes well. Sometimes it doesn't. Either way, it has to be done. That's the job.
Do it fast. The longer you wait, the longer the problem exists. Capture the details the moment you spot something and follow up as soon as possible, in your next 1-to-1 at the latest. A week or two is too long. Strike while the work is still fresh.
Be specific. Focus on observable behaviour, not personality. Be precise about what you saw, when you saw it, and why it matters. You need to be on the same page about what needs to change before you can move forward.
Stay curious. You're going in with feedback, not a verdict. There may be context you don't have. Listen to what they say. Things aren't always as they seem. Just make sure you align on what good looks like before you leave.
Talk about impact. Connect their behaviour to the downstream effect, on the team, the customer, the work. Most people aren't aware of the ripple. Make it visible.
Keep it conversational. Feedback is a dialogue, not a monologue. Your job is to deliver the message; your goal is to help them improve. Create space for reflection. People take more ownership of their development when they feel part of the solution, not the subject of an assessment.
Agree next steps. Leave every conversation with clarity on what changes. What do they do differently next time? Is there training needed? Time with another team member? It should be unambiguous. No one should leave unsure of what's expected.
So what could I actually say?
In your 1 to 1, open with what you've observed.
"I want to talk about something I've noticed in team meetings, because I don't think you're aware of how it's coming across."
The observation: Keep it factual.
"In our last two team meetings, when newer team members have shared ideas, your responses have been quite dismissive. Tuesday, when (colleague) suggested the new triage approach, your reaction was 'we've tried that, it doesn't work', and the conversation moved on.
The question: Hand them the problem.
"What's your read on that? Is there something behind it I'm missing?"
The impact: Make it real.
"Here's why it matters. You're one of the most experienced people on this team, which means people calibrate off you. When you shut an idea down, others stop offering theirs. I'm already seeing newer people go quiet, and that costs us.
The path forward:
"Nothing here is unfixable. You have more influence on this team than anyone, and I'd rather that influence pull people in than shut them down. What would help?"
Wording it this way keeps the conversation on the right side of the line. You're not attacking the person. You're showing them something they can't see and giving them room to own it. People are more willing to accept a hard truth they helped examine far more readily than one handed down from above.
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